Overdue Pregnancy Pillows

'It's Mrs. O'Hara...the one whose due date was 37 days ago...she's angry.'

The Baby Walker

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"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

"It's childhood. Your child has childhood."

"Do you ever get the feeling that maybe the baby is listening to us?"

"Mom, are you going to properly vet the baby before you bring her home from the hospital?"

'Sorry Mrs Jones, but they're unlikely to raise the age to 13.'

Junior Doctor.

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

"Nine months in here?? I trust I can get out in seven months with good behaviour!"

'Sure, have some wool to keep your eggs nice and warm...'

"The good news is that you will have a healthy baby girl. The bad news is that she is a congenital liar."

'Dad, did the stork bring me or did you get me in fantasy draft?'

"Sorry Ma'am, but lamb delivery is only available in Spring..."

A mother hen pushing her baby eggs in a egg carton pram.

Fortune teller predicts a bigger family for worried parents.

"Now they tell me there's a departure tax."

'... And, don't worry about his future. I'm sure my Son will give him a job, when they grow up.'

'You should have used contraceptives -- I'm afraid your lucky socks didn't work.'

What The Father Heres.

Maternity ward on the farm.

'Herbie is my substantial penalty for LATE withdrawal.'

"But you must continue as a lab rat! Can't you see we have three mouths to feed?"

Book from the Library of Alexandria. Woman says: 'Have you seen how overdue this book is?'

Susan used her ingenious invention to carry on playing golf during the final stages of her pregnancy!

'All right. I'll get forty winks, but not one wink more.'

Close Encounters of the 4th Kind...

"My wife's going through a difficult pregnancy."

THE OWL AND THE PUSSYCAT 'Boy, I'll bet their parents were honked off!'