Overconfident Observer Pillows

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"On the contrary, Bosworth, it's YOU who has lost all perspective."

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'

AI Summit

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

"Don't worry, I've performed this procedure hundreds of times."

'I was married to my job, until I recognized it as a co-dependent relationship.'

Bizarre sights.

Kangaroo with a smoking baby.

A man imagines he looks like a farmer on a tractor on a ride-on mower and

'He was a shooting star, passing through the firmament. Lighting up our dull lives with his all too brief presence.' 'I think we're at the wrong funeral.'

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

'Going bald isn't all bad - just think, you'll never have dandruff again!'

"You've done some outstanding work in Public Relations, Benderman. Unfortunately, you work in Accounting.!

'The exercise hasn't been a total failure. My personal trainer lost 10 pounds.'

Opposing viewpoint.

'Man, you are the first parole office to truly understand me.'

"I don't believe the liberal weather media!"

'I don't know why other people pray in school, but I pray in school because I'm not supposed to.'

'Look at the bum on that Wayne, is she that girl that worked at the Burger Shack?'

Church Parking

"And then one day, I had this revelation: Why not go public with my non-profit business and start making some big bucks?"

End of the Pier Show

"Do you have an opinion on opinion polls?"

'If they didn't want us around, how come they keep putting food out for us?"

'Ok...I was wrong. Things can get worse.'

'I've just discovered that the only loop I'm in, is the one I just got thrown for...'

'I hope it's a quick knockout, I'm double parked.'

"I've watched these workout videos for hours. They haven't helped."

"We look very peaceful."

'I said what I thought, then I apologized when I started losing advertisers. What does that make me?'

'It's true I'm homeless...that's why I want the loan.'