Overcompensation Critic Gifts

"I can tell you exactly what he was compensating for."

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

'Your salary will help you learn the lesson that life is not fair.'

"If you're not on the brink of despair you're part of the problem"

"And then, like an idiot, I turned to the boss and said 'Maybe the stock market isn't the only thing that's been overvalued!'"

'It's a treasure map.'

'For those of you who don't wish to know the results of our executives pay...turn away now.'

Payroll Dept. My economic anxiety has less to do with the weak dollar than the week's dollars! (Published originally on March 14, 2008.)

'Just because I'm Overpaid doesn't mean You're Underpaid.'

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

'There are some subjects that are off limits...CEO bonuses...Overtime pay...Business ethics...'

I dread to think what he would have got had they made a profit.

"Don't worry, I've performed this procedure hundreds of times."

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

"Dad, my doorknob broke...can you fix it?"

"Damn shareholders are objecting to 'grotesquely inflated' executive pay... They want us to settle for 'outrageously inflated'!"

"Incentive program, you mean like your paycheck?"

Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of an organization advocating the overthrow of the generous executive bonus system in corporations?

". . . You didn't have to pay for gas and electricity for five years! That's enough compensation, isn't it?"

Boardroom salaries

Boss in Office: 'We've had to recalibrate the bonus system - you now owe us five years worth of luncheon vouchers.'

Hammer Instructions

Fun with Underemployment

"I've never seen anyone actually implode before."

Notice! Management hates to see associates working overtime. So, please keep your doors closed. Thanks!

"Let me just tap this in, Greg, then you can putt out."

The Dark Underbelly of Vegas Fountains

This sun block lotion is so strong, it protects you from sun, lightning strikes, nuclear radiation, and will block cell phone transmissions at 50 feet!

'We don't pay a salary. We've found we can get all the help we need by providing health insurance.'

"When should we specify the people we're suing for unspecified damages?"

Because the company does not offer employees a healthcare plan, we try to boost their compensation in other ways."

"I don't want severance pay but I'm growing tired of sufferance pay."

"Honestly, I forget what we were trying to catch."