Outdoor Pastry Pranksters Mugs

"Looks like your rock cakes are a big hit this year, dear...."

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

"Apple harvest."

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

"Santa's not been happy with your behavior in class and says, get it together or your Christmas won't be merry!"

Cow Pollen

"O.K., one last big rhubarb score. But then I'm out of the pie game for good."

Someone's going to have to tell him he's adopted...

'It's Johnny Taylor's snowsuit, but I don't think he's in there.'

Back to the Holidays

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

'Word to the wise: Always check the cheese for pills.'

'The chef's hat was delicious! But the hair...'

'I am unable to find the words to respond to that.'

"I'm ready to play Hide and go Seek."

Children in a Nursery.

Remember, when we show mommy, we pretend this was your idea, ok?

'Stop fooling around, I can hear my dad coming out of the shower...'

'No problem Mr. Billings, just drop your shorts and let me take a sniff around there.'

'I guess it's true what they say: spirits just don't mix'

'... we've got a crowd of, oh I'd say fourteen million organisms here for the annual 'Salmonella potato salad bowl'!'

"Shouldn't hide treats in your back pocket with a dog that big."

"Yeah, it's a Christmas tree alright! So, we know exactly where the antelopes will be early morning on Christmas day..."

Hide and Seek

I love this age: Old enough to know better, young enough to get away with it. Ketchup.

Children must be accompanied by an adult.

"Mr. Boyd, are you charged with stealing from Bob's bakery. How do you plead?"

Fitz wasn't sure if this was a legitimate rescue or just more culinary trickery.

"I've made my new spaghetti dish."

"So there's this big Mother...."