Outdoor Event Organizer Pillows

'We only have a five minute window, everything has to be time to the last second.'

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Face painting.

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Face painting by numbers.

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

Shakespeare in the Park: "To pee, or not to pee..."

Beginning Yarder.

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

'Let me guess...you're a knights supporter?'

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"Tia Carmen, if you had a bucket list, what would you put in it?"

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

'Last chance to break my leg! I mean, ski this run!'

Who are the most important people at the World Cup?

Extra Long-jump

What if they held a chili cookoff, & nobody came!

Please Do Not Throw Cups of Beer At The Players... It's A Waste of Beer.'

Prosecco

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

Campground Conductor

"Damn! Someone just asked for chicken drumsticks."

"Look! It's the Montgomerys from the breast-cancer walk."

Face Painting.

Apparently summer's going to start next month.

"I seem to have forgotten what I was going to say...please...hold the applause!"

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'