Optimistic Daters Gifts

"I think she likes me. She sat five feet away instead of six."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

The Plinth Wedding Planner Co.

Waterfall of Disappointment

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. That's a relief! How much can they expect out of your on your first day?

"You're right. This is better than sex."

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

Tom's last day.

Research -Development - Wishful Thinking

Newspaper headline is CUTE PUPPY RESCUED. Cat says: 'Sigh! It's all bad news in the papers, isn't it?'

Do-over

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

"My glass is half empty"

A Stray Curmudgeon in a Field of Perennial Optimists.

Cupid gives up trying to get cell phone-using couple together.

World News for 2018

"I always pick Mr. Wrong..."

Sports PsychologyBad at Sports Pscyhology.

'You're paralyzed from the knuckle of your left big toe down -- it could have been a lot worse.'

The Manifestation of Dreams

"Gee, I'm sorry this had to happen on our first date!"

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

"Well, one good thing about being crocodiles is that we tend to have the beach to ourselves..."

'Don't give up hope, Steve -- they may decided to relocate a football franchise here!'

It's more about the journey for me!

"We need to text about our relationship."

'We're projecting growth in the third year, but unfortunately, we'll be out of business by then.'

'On a positive note, we're bottom feeders: We can't go lower than that...'

What star sign are you, let me guess...libra?

Cats Always Land on Their Feet, "So I got this great job the day after we were made redundant"

John awoke feeling more optimistic. "I'm not unemployed - I'm self-employed. There's a difference," he lied.

"And to think, when we met online people said it would never last."

'Wow! -- that's the biggest speed bump I've ever seen!'