Optimistic Daters Gifts

"I think she likes me. She sat five feet away instead of six."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

The Plinth Wedding Planner Co.

Waterfall of Disappointment

"You're right. This is better than sex."

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

Tom's last day.

Research -Development - Wishful Thinking

Newspaper headline is CUTE PUPPY RESCUED. Cat says: 'Sigh! It's all bad news in the papers, isn't it?'

Do-over

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

A Stray Curmudgeon in a Field of Perennial Optimists.

"I always pick Mr. Wrong..."

World News for 2018

'You're paralyzed from the knuckle of your left big toe down -- it could have been a lot worse.'

Sports PsychologyBad at Sports Pscyhology.

The Manifestation of Dreams

"Gee, I'm sorry this had to happen on our first date!"

"It's another letter from Mr. Wentworth. He writes, 'You up?' and then there are some pictures of a smiley face and an eggplant."

"We need to text about our relationship."

"Well, one good thing about being crocodiles is that we tend to have the beach to ourselves..."

'Don't give up hope, Steve -- they may decided to relocate a football franchise here!'

'We're projecting growth in the third year, but unfortunately, we'll be out of business by then.'

What star sign are you, let me guess...libra?

'On a positive note, we're bottom feeders: We can't go lower than that...'

"And to think, when we met online people said it would never last."

John awoke feeling more optimistic. "I'm not unemployed - I'm self-employed. There's a difference," he lied.

Cats Always Land on Their Feet, "So I got this great job the day after we were made redundant"

'Wow! -- that's the biggest speed bump I've ever seen!'

"Relax. Even in a recession, people need rare tropical fighting fish."