Opposites Attract Experts T-Shirts

"Your profile said you were a dog."

'Well, you know what they say about opposite's attracting...'

"If robots can replace workers, then they can replace students. So I created one for me. Now I can stay home all day and play video games."

The reserved and the go-ers.'

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

We should talk...

"I love you, ya big galoot."

"I'm sure you will be very happy together."

'No wrinkles or botox for me: I naturally change my skin every so often...'

'I'm tellin' you, Maurice, you should try it. I feel younger, more confident and just yesterday I caught a coupla gibbons checkin' me out.'

Dinner Mates.

'I can't believe those two tied the knot, they're so mismatched.'

New Milks

Prisoner keeping a calendar on his laptop.

'Well I don't care what these placemats say. I think we're perfect for each other.'

Small man falling in love with large woman

Gullible prunes.

"I've been down here 50 years, but you'd never know it. Staying out of the sun has kept my skin fresh, firm and wrinkle-free."

'Will 50 be enough, madam?'

"Go and kill everyone in Ikea!"

"Patty and Glen met at the Opera. Rich and I met at the beach. Where did you two meet?"

'It'll never work, Richard. We're too different. For example, I only like a parade...'

Opposites Attract.

"I'm binge ignoring everything you're binge watching."

Snail Air Balloon

Early one morning The Grim and The Happy Reaper pay Alice a visit.

"Don’t think of it as a retirement community, think of it as a cave."

"Uh-uh! No way! Don't even think about it!"

'I've crossed chalk with cheese!'

Lion and Lamb Peacefully reading at Home.

"We're Siamese twins, but you get a choice. he's a jock, and I'm a geek."

Plastic Surgery: Growing Old Is Not An Option

"Good news! You're in a great condition for a man of 60!"

After hours...

'You'll catch your death of cold out in this weather!'