Opener Of Mysteries T-Shirts

'Don't give up Albert - one of these cans has to have tuna in it!'

hard-boiled egg...

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

'Ah Mr Bond, I haven't been expecting you...'

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

"I've run out of invisible ink..."

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of "CSI: Miami" to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45pm? The Youtube generation grows up fast.

Young Stephen King

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

Formula.

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

'That isn't true Mrs. Jones, I can find my ass with both hands. And if you want me to prove it, it'll be $150.00 a day, plus expenses.'

'If you promise to never try to openthe locked attic door, the owner will take $20,000 off!'

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I ruin it for you by saying it was the butler who did it? Such a good book..."

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

'The hair-raising twists and turns, the mystery, numbing assault on the mind...THAT'S why I love tax law!'

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

Sherlock Holmes investigating a washing machine.

'Are you sure this is all you can remember seeing after you were attacked?'

"Two coffees Miss Jones, one with sodium pentathol."

Murdered man spells out his murderer in alphabet soup.

Cricket widow's revenge

"I'm curious. Who did murder me?"

"No one is looking. I'll just add a little mercury nitrate."

"I love my unreliable narrator. You?"

Practicing for the lie detector test...'I have only $800 in the bank. I was never in Chicago. I know nothing about the dog food business.'

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

"Did he have any known enemies?"

"Hurry up with your investigation—he's lying on the remote."

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'