Opener Of Mysteries T-Shirts

'Don't give up Albert - one of these cans has to have tuna in it!'

hard-boiled egg...

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

Benjamin Bunny re-writes Beatrix Potter

"I've run out of invisible ink..."

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Young Stephen King

Formula.

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

'That isn't true Mrs. Jones, I can find my ass with both hands. And if you want me to prove it, it'll be $150.00 a day, plus expenses.'

"This is too hard, but I'd recognize him on his own."

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I ruin it for you by saying it was the butler who did it? Such a good book..."

'If you promise to never try to openthe locked attic door, the owner will take $20,000 off!'

'The hair-raising twists and turns, the mystery, numbing assault on the mind...THAT'S why I love tax law!'

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

'Are you sure this is all you can remember seeing after you were attacked?'

Sherlock Holmes investigating a washing machine.

Murdered man spells out his murderer in alphabet soup.

"Two coffees Miss Jones, one with sodium pentathol."

Cricket widow's revenge

Practicing for the lie detector test...'I have only $800 in the bank. I was never in Chicago. I know nothing about the dog food business.'

"I love my unreliable narrator. You?"

"I'm curious. Who did murder me?"

"No one is looking. I'll just add a little mercury nitrate."

'I don't know officer: They all look alike to me...'

"Did he have any known enemies?"

"Hurry up with your investigation—he's lying on the remote."

"What we're going to say to the jury is 'Love the embezzler. Hate the embezzlement."

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'