Open House Enthusiast Pillows

'Is this the open house?'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"I didn't spark joy."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'For Sale by Neighbor'

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

Real Estate Personals

Emigrating to France.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Commerical real estates' man excited by peak in sleeping 'Rental rates' monitor

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

America's funniest investment scams

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.