Op-ed Enthusiast Pillows

"Trump op-eds on the right, tell-alls on the left and cartoons in the middle."

You Are Here - Uncle Sam's Exit Strategy

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

Opinion Dislodgement Disorder (ODD).

'On a personal note, I'm pleased to report I've been upgraded from reporter to opinionated loudmouthed pundit.'

"I don't have any opinions, and my wife things whatever Oprah thinks,."

Editor. Short. Sweet.

How very Independent!

'Never mind four out of five doctors.. what do four out of five LAWYERS recommend?'

Audacity of Hope.

'Day is day and night is night. That's the opinion of the management of this station. Here with a rebuttal, is attorney...'

"I can't even hear myself think now that everyone has a blog."

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

'Did you cut your lip shaving, or are you trying to avoid offering an opinion on the Affordable Health Care bill?'

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

What's your stupid opinion on the following...

'Hey man that's a gas!'

'That was the view of the right side of my brain...now the view from the left side...'

'He's a man of few words. Words to the editor not included.'

NBS NEWS DIVISION, 'You've written a nice editorial on Sarah Palin here, but change 'said' to 'spewed,' and 'speech' to 'vitriol.''

It isn't just the media that's biased...often the voters are too.

'McWit, your poetic license expired years ago.'

"I'm undecided, but that doesn't mean I'm apathetic or uninformed."

"I know absolutely nothing about that subject, but I will give you my opinion."

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

"They're all down there sentenced to an an eternity of fornication, licentiousness and intoxication."

'Do you offer a degree in punditry?'

"Who am I to question our government's policies? I'll tell you who I am! I'm Bernard A. Nesbitt, who reads the 'Times,' the 'Wall Street Journal,' the 'Post,' 'Newsweek,' 'Time,' 'Business Week,' 'U.S.News & World Report,' 'Look,' 'Life,' and 'Saturday Evening Post.' That's who I am!"

Jimmy Hill

"Sad case, doctor; withdrawal from having a president who doesn't insult everybody."

'It cost a mint to educate him. If you want his opinion, you'll have to pay for it.'