Online Sheriff Pillows

'Hold on, Ma, he's posting.'

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

Billy. The Kid.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Reach for the sky, stranger."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

'I haven't done anything. My ex-wife had those posters printed.'

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

"According to national law you're innocent but national law counts less than. . ."

"Say, you were right, Sheriff, this is the best way to keep up with the 'Space-Hopper Gang'."

The Lawman

"I told you, I can’t scratch your belly right now."

"Today we can help herd cattle, go on a nature hike, get a sauna and massage, or go into town and rob the bank."

Sheriff.

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

'When I said loosen your buckle and let 'em drop, I was talking about your gunbelt.'

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

Gun Ego

"Belly rubs later, girl. Belly rubs later."

'Stick em up' Kid plays with gun

'You dirty, snivelling, low down, arrogant son of a gin-swilling kleptomaniac.'

"Frank, how many times do I have to tell you, it's a posse, not a search engine."

The modern sheriff.

"I've already go t a diagnosis from homedoc.com..."

"I think you need to enroll yourself in a good two-step program."

I could clean up this town if I could keep my gun belt on.

"Deputy, round up a posse, I can't find my phone."

"Sheriff, with these little blue pills they won't be calling you Deadwood Dick any longer."

Uh-oh!

'They say he came to clean up the town.'