Online Community Explorer Pillows

'My Atheist blog has developed a cult following. If that's not ironic, I don't know what is.'

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

Evolution.

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

Bird Tweet.

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Paranoia vs Social Currency.

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

Which Hogwarts house are you?

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

Computer Life

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

"Sorry, I don't have an opinion - just in case I get vilified on social media. . ."

"Today I'm going to search and scroll and swipe and binge."

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

Computer spying.

'Today we learned if it ain't on Google, it ain't worth knowing.'

"Remember when we used to waste our entire lives for free?"

Wiccapedia.

'It turns out it wasn't an Internet scam after all. It was just a really bad investment idea.'

At the modern antenatal class.

'And whenever I attempt cybersex, my computer freezes.'

"Mom, can we get a pet so I can use its name in answering a password security question?"

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

'No, I'm not a connoisseur, but I do have a website.'

He's a statue. I told him not to friend Medusa on Facebook.

'My friend Andy is outside with his laptop. He wants to know if I can come out and blog.'

"Our specials can also be accessed at www.todaysspecials.com."

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

How do they know me so well?

"What happened today? A bully hacked into the school electronic payments account and stole my lunch money."

Social Networking Explained.

"Keep your eyes on your own screen."

"I've joined the world's fastest growing social media website..."