One-up Storytelling Pillows

"That story reminds me of the time I walked on the moon."

6 Brothers Falafel

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Creativity

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

Fairy tale

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

fairy tales

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

Witch dice.

"A homeless person ate my homework."

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

Crafty Beer: "I'm making a scrapbook of when you were still fermenting."

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."

'Have you ever thought about doing a children's book?'

'It's a reinterpretation of the 'Christmas Carol'...but with a 'Vampire vs Werewolf' contemporary take on the story.'

'Tech stocks tumbled on news that Alan Greenspan's computer was down.'

"We have sparkling and still, but I'll have to ask if we have black."

"Constructive criticism? It says I can't write my way out of a paper bag, and you call it constructive criticism."

"This big eraser? It's for graphic novels."