Olympics Watching Gifts

'I know I promised to get off my backside and take up a sort once the Olympics had finished - but it ain't over yet!'

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

Putting Practice.

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'And now on the comedy channel Jose Mourinho's latest outburst.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

Beijing Olympics - Treadmill.

'John is watching the game under protest.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

"Thursday-Morning Quarterback"

Man watching football on T.V. in armchair made of beer cans.