Old-timey Charm Lover Gifts

"Sure, this used to be a one horse town, but not anymore...the horse died!"

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

Colonial Larrysburg.

"Call Harris back from retirement and ask him how we did things around here before computers."

"Everybody meets online these days."

"They must be from a time when it was safe to meet in the park at night."

Old-fashioned computer

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

'Did you hear? We have a new slogan: Artisan-crafted wine made the old-world way.'

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

"Your being boring, stuffy and predictable is part of your charm."

Person Reading For Pleasure

"You're the one who wanted to go someplace off the beaten track - you ask him what's gluten free."

Let me stand behind that one and you take my picture.

"Son, you're old enough now to whittle your own condom."

"You remember Eric. He used to carry my books home from school."

"It's nice to know I've still got it."

'You travelled 6,000 miles to find Chateau Grande Magnifique? Buddy, you're looking at it.'

Victorian bachelors leering over woman.

"Sssay, you're a real charmer!"

A shepherd with crook.

'Who says suave sophistication is dead?'

"I think we're beginning to chip away at the stigma."

Adult filmstrips

World's oldest activist: 'YANKEE GO HOME, since 1919'

Turkey wary of Christmas

An Irishman unfamiliar with how a telephone works

Spring Cleaning

Lady talking to artist at a party

Antiques: Please do not use door knocker.

Horse riders

'Oh, sure... He LOOKS tough, but he can't hold his drink.'

Chimney Sweep

"It's not outdated - it's retro."