Offshore Adventurer Gifts

Offshore tax haven. Will build to suit.

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Captain in a storm

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Thinks he's too cool for school.

"Scuba cow"

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"If you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean..."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

'Slip Ahoy!'

Fish snorkling above water.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

'If you want to catch that fish ship open on the way home, we'd better leave now, daddy.'

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Sea weed harvest.

Easter Island is still a tourist site after the oceans rise due to global warming.

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

Titanic: How's my steering.

"Heads or tails?"

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Remote controlled car on a boat.

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

Guide to Carpentry Fish

"See what happens when you go swimming after eating!"

"I like my vodka like I like my ships - on the rocks!"