Office Safety Training Pillows

"The following is a test of the fire-alarm system. It is only a test. Please ignore the intense heat and combustion."

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

"We need a union!'

"Try not to think of them just as a 'customer' but rather as your only chance of paying your mortgage and putting food on your plate."

"I think we should try something a little simpler."

Time Out For Teddy

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

'Yeah, I slipped on a banana skin too...'

Sand danger

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

'He refused to climb the ladder without a safety net.'

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

No Smoking.

Labor Day '19

Wear a helmet

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'

'Here are the safety manuals you wanted'

First Aid Box

"Fifty quid for a high visibility jacket? Why, that's day-glo robbery."

"I was running through the hallways and forgot to watch out for the low-hanging fruit."

"I see you do all your own stunts."

'Mr Bluebeard is our safety officer.'

"They never told us what carrying twenty times our own weight would do to our knees."

'Just say no to ch-e-e-s-ee!'

"I can't believe it! In all my years in corporate business, yours must be the worst case of paper cuts I have ever seen."

"Bob put a chair with wheels on the table and climbed up to change a light bulb. Then the chair rolled away, Bob fell and... well, I guess we need a new industrial safety specialist."