Office Party Lover Gifts

'This is Hargreaves - he's in charge of corporate hospitality.'

Men. Women. Party Poopers.

From all of us.

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

21st century water cooler conversations.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

"The meeting will come to order."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Here and There Trays

That shows business confidence.

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

Bacchus.

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

Sign - Halt manager crossing

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Party Animals.

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

Gerry, there are more accurate ways of balancing the petty cash.

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."