Office Parties Pillows

"How come you never give me ideas like that?"

'Hey, everyone! I think I found the bottleneck!'

"Not the most impressive strategic plan I've ever seen."

"All work and no play makes you a valued employee."

'Have you noticed it, too?'

"The first goal of our ad hoc committee should be to learn Latin."

'Do you think that's actually work he takes home? Or office supplies?'

'I don't know who's cranking up the air conditioning out here, but knock it off!'

"Oops! Wrong plug."

Drinks vending machine: Tea, Coffee, No idea what this is, Urgh, and Best not.

If found, please return to cubicle L-325.

When he was between Executive Assistants, filing became a challenge for Jonathan.

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Stop worrying! If this firm was facing bankruptcy, we'd be the first to know.'

'First you feel shock, then anger, and finally remorse. It's the three stages of grief when buying the tuna sandwich.'

"You know what I always say: when you're up to your rear in alligators, it's a bit late to talk about draining the swamp!"

"Meetings are where I've learned to communicate with my coworkers via facial expressions only."

"Not quite – one ankle on top of the other!"

'All right, I wanna know which ones of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

'Elaine, take a ditty.'

Big Talk/Small Talk.

'First, we need to set some boundaries.'

'You remember Mr. Horton? You know, the one you said to give the 'clean desk' award to? -- you fired him three years ago.'

"Things are getting desperate...we have to do something!"

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

"I think you are meant to delegate"

Corporate Punishment.

'This button connects you to the inner ear of every worker.'

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"In an effort to make this a more pleasant meeting, I have taken the liberty of rotating our sales figures chart counter-clockwise a full ninety degrees."

"I'm so bored, I'm waiting for a fire drill."

"Team, I'd like to introduce Mr. Mandrake aka 'The Sales Magician'."

"Take my advice. I don't use it anyway."

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

"It looked like a really powerful presentation when I did it at 3 o'clock this morning!"