Office Fitness Gifts

Office Safety.

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

'Many Happy Redundan... HA! RETURNS of the day, Mackay.'

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

"Apart from that, Bob, what else did you learn on the team-building paintball weekend?"

Office worker chips a golf ball into in tray on a desk at work.

"Yup, marathon meetings all day."

"It's called a treadmill workstation, not a stationary rat race."

'Where's your costume and team spirit? You're not paid to enjoy yourself - you should enjoy your work!'

Frustrated at the office.

"Daddy needs to relax. He spent another long day at work extolling the virtues of his stand up desk."

Heavy Workload

"Why did you just dump my kiwi-colada smoothie on my head?" "I'm glad you (huff) asked." "Studies (huff) show that sitting all (huff) day long behind a desk leads (huff) to obesity, sickness, (huff) toe-swelling (huff) and an early, (huff) excruciating (huff) death." "So more (huff) and more (huff) office workers are using (huff) standing desks (huff) with treadmills." "Have you ever (huff) tried handing someone (huff) a smoothie while running (huff) on a treadmill?" "They walk. ...walk."

'Sales has challenged us to a snowball fight.'

Happy Office

'The company have been very accommodating in allowing him to train in office hours.'

Jack felt much better, now that he was working out.

Lady keeping fit by skipping with her mouse chord.

No, dear, I couldn't workout today, but I did do some strenuous selling and rigorous reinvestment!

Gigantic Titan Inc personnel: 'We have plenty of computer nerds! What we need is jocks to make our softball team more competitive!'

Rowing machine attached to a desk.

Reduce stress-related injuries and turbo-charge your career with these easy workstation exercises!

The Executive Manual of Exercise

"Scoot over. I could use a workout too."

"It's Friday, Steve - have a donut!"

'Says you like to play practical jokes.'

"If your going to get frustrated with your computer and assault it, may I suggest stretching first. You have three pulled muscles."

The people downstairs are complaining about your extra curricular activities.

"Our mandatory fitness program has nothing to do with health. It generates electricity, which saves the company money."

'For the busy modern man, the executive body stocking. Even the shoes are attached.'

"Want to win?"

"Wouldn't you get a lot more work done if you switched to a different type of software?"