Office Escapists Gifts

They all thought they'd be astronauts...instead they're all accountants.

Overworked colleague calling the Samaritans.

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

"What's the problem? We told you when you started you'd have to make some sacrifices."

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

Workaholic on holiday

I hate sitting in traffic jams. - 'Move it! I need to get work.' - 'I hate sitting at my desk.' -

Forms I cannot deal with / Forms I will not deal with

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

Whiskers realized he'd grown tired of the rat race.

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

Stress

'I hear they're letting you go. Your family must have paid the ransom.'

"Lisa, bring out the Alistair Cheng files and an iced mochaccino, if you will, please."

"Cubicle 311 is our 'cultural oasis'."

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

"How do you feel about working a four-day week?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

"Quit daydreaming and get back to work."

That very night in Frank's office a forest grew.

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

Next, I recall looking down at myself and thinking, God, what a drama queen.

"I think it's important to have a hobby outside of work...mine is eating chocolate."

Clock watcher

Man Looking Through Window

'Now, dear, I spent 35 years pretending to look busy. I can't just quit overnight!'

"Where do you see yourself getting drunk in five years?"

'I'd like to come home... if I could.'