Office Decorator Gifts

"I told you when you moved into Dr. Condee's office that his bookshelves were due to collapse any day."

'It's not here for artistic value. It's here to discourage employee theft.'

"Do you have a desk with a little more resonance when I thump it?"

"Does this desk make my job look big?"

Proctologist

'I don't like the painting either, but it is part of our corporate culture.'

"I don't care that you personalized your work area, but stop yelling 'Howdy, neighbor!' to everyone you see!"

"Have a couple of dreams and call me in the morning."

A dentist places his first tooth and his first dollar on the wall.

'If you're not going to help decorate the office, give me back the plastic Santa.'

'Excess is the way I measure success.'

'Your plants can stay, but you have to go.'

'Why don't you see what it looks like when you give it a thump, Mr.Babacock.'

'I must have that painting for my office.'

''Midnight in Paris' didn't work in the conference room. Let's try something more vibrant like 'Sunrise Over Wall Street.''

'It's a jungle out there, Ms. Hobbs. Must we make it one in here, too?'

Man with photos of cakes on his desk

'Your new grade level rates an office, but the furniture comes assembly required.'

"It was the boss' suggestion...that I take a working vacation...in the office."

'I couldn't get away for a vacation so I brought the vacation to me.'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

That shows business confidence.

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'