Office Culture Connoisseur Gifts

"You seem to have the right combination of bitterness, pessimism, and caffeine consumption that we're looking for."

"Staff support"

"Ahhh....I think that was a flying fuck."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

"That's six 'noes' and one 'aye', the ayes have it"

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

"He ate homework as a puppy but quickly moved onto business journals."

"Damn it,Frank,if I can't bully my staff, who can I bully?"

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

The new diet not working out too good, huh, Frank?

'I have no one to blame but myself, for now.'

"It's not downsizing—it's just that we have 976 employees who have chosen to spend more time with their families."

"I'll tell you what I'm looking for! I'm looking for a yes man, Jenson. Do you think you could fit that bill?"

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"Sklar, Liebowitz, Rubin and Kaminsky... Attorneys a go-go."

"Hi Sean, welcome to my open space. Take a stand and let's talk."

-Great little number cruncher! -But lousy table manners.

"Well, I'm the company sports champion! During the lunch break I ate more hamburgers than any other colleague!"

"While you were out, Mr. Sundberg, the little hand went from the one to the three."

"Quicksand in a modern office building? Don't be silly."

"Anyway, we'd love to have You on board for the Creighton deal."

'Your employee is either guilty of 'gross misconduct' or 'gross negligence'... you can't start disciplinary procedures on the basis that he is just 'plain gross'.'

Group of people.

'He always has your back - - - but it's mostly to step on.'

"The first chart is pre-Prozac and this chart is post-Prozac ... "

'Our company hasn't changed much over the years. Most ideas still come from the top.'

'I feel a leader should be approachable.'

"Here we use the email term 'out of the office', not 'away lazing on a Spanish beach, without a care in the world.'"

A worker has 3 trays, and in tray, an out tray and a can we talk about it in the morning? tray

'Management is very concerned about 'work life' balance, particularly where back room staff are concerned...We think you give too much, you need to get your lives back.'

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"Business has been steady."

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?