Office Chatterbox T-Shirts

'That was a long winded conversation...I thought he'd never stop listening.'

'We're going to have to put a stop to all the gossiping by the water cooler.' (water cooler spreading gossip).

'Cold hard facts are good, but to complete the picture, here's Brenda from the mailroom with some hot, juicy gossip.'

I'd like to explain my ideas for economy with the company.

"My boyfriend is lazy, cheap and a total control freak...but I never say anything bad about him."

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

"I'm overpaid and underworked, but you don't see me complaining!"

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

Moo Out Loud

The Mating Call of the Modern Youth

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"I hear you may do a baby."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

'I don't like her line of gossip - it's never about anyone I know.'

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

'What do you mean I've wolfed that down? You've never stopped nattering!'

Flotation Device on the Phone

Person talks on phone as other blogs.

Let's tell the folks in the Garlic Belt there's no budget for steps 2 and 3.

The Exhaustive Bro Catch Up

"I figure if I don't have that third martini, then the terrorists win."

"Thanks for your offer, but in our company we still have a perfect information and communication system. It's called water cooler talk."

"I can't believe this! All these filthy messages on your cell phone! And so many of them! What is it? 100? 500? 1,000?"

'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'

'Maybe the first couple of times, but believe me, the 'Are you following my Tweets' is no longer funny.'

Now see, we couldn't have this kind of fun, if we met online.

'Can't we ever just have a conversation?'

'If that's the Police Station - we're not here!'

"Who's up for some commercially successful music?"