Office Activities Gifts

Belief and Trust.

'Good morning, I am Mister Greenreaper independent consultant. The management has asked me to reorganize your department in oder to improve its productivity and its competivity.'

"A good employee never stops learning new skills."

Caution: High-five area.

'Well, occasionally it is good to see team members outside the office.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"My email is down... talk to me."

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

'That's our mission statement.'

In basket-case.

Copycats

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."