Odor Combatant Gifts

'Here, take this. It came in handy when I used to change your nappy.'

Skunk Scent Killer

Fumes from furniture

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

'I think you got the drummer - Now try for the trumpet player!'

Chiropodist is wearing a gas mask while treating a client.

' I've got a feeling I'm going to get a bite.'

'I know I never play it. I only borrow it from next door to stop him playing the damn thing!'

'Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment.'

Summer Decorating

'Assuming the cockroach I need to kill weighs 180 pounds, how much of this pesticide would I need?'

'You really need to start washing your sock puppets.'

'No matter what I do I can't get rid of his squid marks.'

"Stop, Frank! That's not deodorant!"

"Then all smell broke loose."

One man and his dog odour spray.

"Whew ... now he needs some roll-on deodorant."

Death unplugs the the life support of polluting industry

The sick environment

'When this is over with, I'm going to need a LOT of aromatherapy!'

'But we spend all our money creating toxic waste. We were hoping someone else would figure out how to detoxify it.'

"I'll take your case, and those stage smells inn your backyard will be tracked down and eliminated."

"Kind of a moot point, isn't it?"

'And I want the windows to be sound proof.'

At the underarm odor judge training program, something plucks a chord..."

Smell No Evil

'Take that thing outside. As if we don't stink enough.'

"No, for the last time, I don't smell 'something funny.' Perhaps you and I simply have a different sense of humor."

'How did you know I have a foot fetish?'

Deodorant required.

'Keep your distance, Mr Robinson - this perfume spray is loaded!'

"Daddy is anxious for Spring."

Warning: Do Not Breathe - Breathing May Cause Death or Serious Injury