Odds Speculator Gifts

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

"Your assumption that a one in a million chance event MUST be a miracle shows you drastically underestimate the total number of regularly occurring events."

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'Dow, Jones, Russell & Nikkei - Leading economic indicators.'

'Can you see the future of my 401(k)?'

Dept of Probability: Maybe, Possibly, Perhaps.

'I wonder how this is going to affect the market?'

"What the hell happened to this town?"

'Stocks plummeted today, on forecasts that tomorrow will be warm and muggy.'

'Now this is a fabulous strategy that has worked flawlessly every year, except for those when it failed miserably.'

"Just in case you want to invest, I've got a great idea for a dot.com startup."

'The market dropped sharply on the rumor that new sell off rumors in the financial sector will lead to more widespread rumors...'

Department of Pure Speculation.

Wall Street Down

Stock Market Adventure

'You've become unbearable since you started working in that betting shop!'

"And finally for the record, the clerk of the court has odds of 6-4 guilty, 2-1 not guilty..."

"Some say we can't go on making millions forever, but I think they're wrong!"

"Now do you see, Betty, what a little luck, a few sound investments and the shameless inflation of corporate profits through bogus transactions can buy."

"...And that's the studio where we filmed the Moon Landing..."

They lean more of how the universe began, but can't tell me where the market will end.

"No one knows what he does, but it's rumored that he's the guy who sets global oil prices."

Finance Director killed by falling profits

'What I want you to do is spot any mistakes before I make them.'

Man hugging bag of money, falling down a hole.

The tumbling dice...

'A wonderful sermon, father; I liked the part about a time to sew and a time to reap. When would you say I should cover the naked December calls I sold last month?'

'There's a horse in the next race called 'Taxman' - he MUST win!'

Handicap Parking Only - Ticket Odds 4 to 1.

"When do we all start frantically buying gold again?"

'On days when the stock market suffers sharp losses... it's best not to mention in recovery.'

"I like the look of this steamer in the 2.30."