Oceanic Detective T-Shirts

Well, you're busted! Forensics just came back: the bite-marks match your dental records!

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"The note in the bottle said someone's stranded here, but where is he?"

He can identify a fly taken by a trout at fifty yards range.

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

Chicken soup for the sole.

The lunar landing of Appollo 11 is shown as a hoax filmed in a studio.

A close shave on the Titanic...

"Just in case you want to invest, I've got a great idea for a dot.com startup."

'Should I call the auto club of the coast guard?'

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

"Uh-Oh, gotta go lads. . . I smell blood!"

'Forget it! — I'm not sailing all the way back to Europe just to get you a box of crackers!'

No Shoes, No Service.

"I'd like to report this stowaway I discovered two weeks ago, Captain."

"The bailouts are nice but my retirement remains finding drugs that washed up on the beach."

Oceanographer

"So in other words, we're hoping to discover what makes the nitty, gritty."

Testing the Big Bangs theory.

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

"Oh, but it's fine for you to hang out where I eat."

"What are you yelling at me for? You're the one at the tiller."

"Okay buster!! On the ground and arms behind your back!!"

"You've still got, like, a solid eight inches."

"From the gentleman at the end of the bar."

'I became an astronaut for the sex, and now you tell me it's forbidden!'

"Warning! The fish in this lake are very smart!!"

'Are you sure those are dolphins?'

A ship's captain stranded on an iceberg with a hungry polar bear.

Wally's on Discovery Channel tonight!

'Steer clear of the blow hole until we get to Sausalito.'

"Hey! Is that a tiny speaker making ocean noises, and a little camera?"

"Because the sea can be a cruel mistress."

"It's the perfect stocking stuffer!"

Replacements for Paul the Psychic Octopus