Obtaining A Mortgage Mugs

Mortgage Ability Test.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

'For an explanation of the financial terms of this loan, please enroll in a continuing-education economics class at your local community college.'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

First National Bank. Keep life exciting --- Ask about our variable rate, interest-only mortgages.

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

Three little pigs-mortgage.

"If I'm such a poor risk, how did I get so deep into debt?"

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

"Since you had so much fun with the Home Equity Loan I gave you, this year's stocking will be filled with a shiny new Notice of Foreclosure."

Reverse Mortgage.

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

Bank Loans - Thank you, I shall always be in your debt.

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

"Their titles from left to right are, 'Holiday in Palm Springs','Next mortgage payment' and 'Deposit on a new Porsche'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"What do you mean you wouldn't sweat the water in the basement."

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

Emigrating to France.