Obedience Pillows

"But stay off the couch."

"Of course I hear it when you say 'come'. I just choose to ignore it."

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

"Company? My God, I'd wet the floor too."

Puppy school vs. kitten school

Dog Training.

'Sometimes, I wonder if Master realizes we are dogs: He always says 'good boy, good boy'...'

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

Agility God

"Shake! Good Dog."

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

Marv was trying to teach Rufus how to be a REAL retriever.

Dog Training Academy and the Cat Anarchy Club.

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

Jump Boy!God, your life must be dull.

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

'Mac, I told you last week a collar and a tag aren't enough - there's a leash law in this town.'

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

'I want a dog who will fetch my things, so don't sell me one that drools.'

'I'm tired of sitting and staying.'

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

"What, again? You've gotta be kidding me!"

"Not until you fetch the other one."

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"