Obedience Class Clown Gifts

'They give you a lot of treats while they're training you, so play dumb for as long as you can.'

'They wouldn't let him graduate from obedience school - he bit the valedictorian.'

Tony's dog always brought him to his slippers.

"I'm not sure if my name is sit, stay, or get off the couch!"

Ethics exam cheater.

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

'Hi, Miss Henderson, we did collage in class today. Can you drive me home?'

"Bad dog."

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

"Well, look at the bright side, Timmy — you're 100 percent wrong."

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

Young Dr. Dolittle.

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

"In economics, I got an IOU."

'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'

"Your rule about no yelling out in class...that's a violation of my 1st Amendment rights!"

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

Civics Class: Mock Election Today. Oh, no --- Another multiple choice test!

"I want to be street smart so I can be a road scholar."

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'

"I lettered in spelling."

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!