Oasis Seeker T-Shirts

"You can't miss it - it's the third mirage on the left."

Notice in desert - Wrong Cartoon Ahead

'That's alright Kenny, your dipstick says you've still got half a tank left...'

"Yeah, finding an oasis to drink from would be good, but boy, finding one big enough to have a long, cold bath in would be Heaven!"

"Ahhh... close enough."

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

Remote control pirate bully

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

The fate of the emigrant

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

The experienced backpacker.

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Easter Island legs

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Tourists

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

Desert Island Meals.

Beach con-man.

'Cannonball!'

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

"Look what I found, dad!"

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

Pirate

A tortoise toboggans down a hill in its shell

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure