Nurturing Enthusiast Pillows

'There's only one problem drinking from these. I can't dunk a biscuit.'

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'No. no. When your wife asked you to change the baby, she meant the diaper.'

'So this is goodbye then!'

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

"Should we keep the receipt in case of returns."

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

"I'm not sure what's causing your stomachache. But I think it's safe to rule out hunger pains."

'Who cares about content? With a title like this it'll sell millions!'

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"I'll give you 15 minutes, no biting."

"Not to alarm you, but the other newborns are already ahead."

'Breasts can be so rude. So often they start without me.'

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Aiiiii! Fat! Cholesterol! Food!

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

"It appears your high sodium bacon is playing havoc with your blood pressure."

'Congratulations! It's one of the beautiful people!'

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

'Let me introduce my biggest supporter, a real whale of a guy, a huge fan..'

Some people have their own methods of dealing with a shortage of nurses

'If you haven't been taking your vitamins. What have you been doing with them?'

'Hello - is that Jamie Oliver?'

'No offence. The other breast and I seemed to click.'

Food Pyramid.

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'