Number-crunching Maven Gifts

'I've added this up six times and still can't get it to balance!'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'Don't worry about it. If at first we don't succeed, we can do it later and get paid time-and-a-half for it.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

"Just go with the workflow."

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

'Better brace yourself. It looks as though your broker's now equipping your monthly statement with crumple zones.'

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Man carrying his boss.

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

"That's how my father looked when I told him I was going to marry you."

"What kind of crazy management scheme is this?"

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'The only way to survive these days is to diversify.'

'How dare you accuse me of sinking this company?'

'Hmm...this new management fad is crazy enough that it might just work...'

"You're doing great - keep it up."

'Attention, all department heads: the buck stops there. I've had it!'

Reconnaissance reports your email blast to Sales was a direct hit, with acceptable collateral damage in Finance and Accounting.

"Successful leadership involves more than just shouting at people."

'This spider's web proves that you've done no work today!'

"I can't fire him. He has corporate sponsors!"

'U.S. Manufacturing'

Business News: Economic Growth Indicators are Up, Led By Car Repairs, Divorce Costs, Open Heart Surgeries and Toxic Waste Cleanups.