November 5th Pillows

"You spoil that canary."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

"If this goes badly I'm going to post it on my youtube job interview bloopers channel."

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

'Are we broke yet?'

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

'I'm just using this while my monster truck is in the shop.'

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

Peter

"Your mother and I think it's time you got a place of your own. We'd like a little time alone before we die."

30 Days Has Movember

Clubbing

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

"No, I want to know the meaning of never calling your mother."

'Cool! Where'd you learn the new step?'

"This is off our first TikTok."

Professional woman in pub

"Pavlov's dog: Friday night"

"I found the perfect job! You don't do any work, stay at home, make funny videos, and you get full salary and benefits!!"

Balloon tattoos

"From the gentleman at the end of the bar. Again."

"It's Friday the 13th. I feel lucky!"

"Sorry, had to barf real quick... so where were we?"

"Your old Jewish mother with some pickled herring, sir. To remind you of your roots,"

'I blame my parents, they never set me any standards worth rebelling against.'

Chairs - a bar where everybody has a seat!