Novelty Gift Collector Gifts

'Mom, Dad, I prefer gathering.'

Builders bum

'Worlds best Sh***er'. Mug gift from flies.

Loud Quitting

'Classy place. They even left a mint on our pillow.'

The Sea Angler: And warm sensible clothing is vital for full enjoyment of the sport.

Snake accessories.

'There's a trampoline training hall on the floor below us...'

"I told you, Doctor! There's nothing in here!"

"We didn't need it at the cottage anymore, and it already had a hole in the floor."

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

Clown on bike.

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Hay Rides $10

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"Recalculating route..."

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Fossil record player.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

A crab with a utility knife claw

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'What kind of filling would you like?'

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

"Roadkill cookies"

Lavatory Waterfall

Peter Benchley's New Book Fish!

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'