Novelty Dieter T-Shirts

Jogging incentives.

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Like death by salad.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

Critisize your weight.

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

Secretive Weigh In.

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'This towel is wet so I'll subtract fourteen pounds.'

'Diet considerations.'

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"I'm not sure what's causing your stomachache. But I think it's safe to rule out hunger pains."

'I'm putting you on a 'whatever tastes good, don't eat it' diet.'

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

Attack of the 'health' foods

Women holding onto birds so that her weight seems lower

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"...there, I found it. Stellar! I love this nutrition app!"

Mind, Body, Spirit (and Food Court).

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"Frankly, dear, I think you've been on this paleo diet much too long!"

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"