Novelty Creator Gifts

The Great Chemical Novel.

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Dog Walking Services

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Raincloud Umbrella

'What clan do you belong to?'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Crap from the future.

Advocado

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

Hay Rides $10

Useless add-ons.

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

A man is trying to play golf with a football boot attached to a stick.

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Sorry, Frank, I know this is your favourite lake, but I just can't eat fish who smoke cigarettes.'

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

Mohammad's motors

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

'Don't you think it's just a little weird to have a cemetery for houseplants?!'

Crane Game. Ball Game.

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"I'm still not sure if we've hired a creative genius or a complete cretin."

'The New... New, Swiss Army Knife.'

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

Toenail clipping missile.

Scrooge is visited by the ghost of prehistoric past.

Clock and Watch Shop: Second-Hand Clocks and Minute-Hand Clocks.