Novel Newbie T-Shirts

Vanity Publishing - The customer is always write

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

"Triple whammy."

"Smiley, where will we be in 10 years?"

'Quantitative easing' made easy for dummies.

'Today, in kindergarten, we learned how to count to one.'

'You may well, Ms. Ferris, one day write a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' bonkbuster, but today your account is one shade of red.'

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

Fisherman's new baby.

'Hello, technical support? Which one is the 'any key'?'

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

'Your first trial?'

Zero interest CDs! Why pay taxes?

"I can't believe I'm in college. I never even found Waldo yet."

"Of course he's not our son. You wanted me to change the baby, didn't you?"

"How'd you know I was from New York?"

"So THIS is what the outside looks like..."

'It's so weird at college, mom. The kids there are so different.'

"You may well have been here first but it doesn't work like that."

'Of course you can move back in with us, Son... but after only one day?'

"Dude...Smiley wants to meet me for a burger...maybe it means she's hungry."

"So we're cool? We can go on a date?"

'I was doing okay in the stock market until I started investing too heavily in liquid assets!'

New to New York, Mr Golez often felt he was living in a garbage can.

"There's that funny squealing again - I think it's coming from your side."

'Free 'I love money' bumper sticker to new investors.'

"Let's tow the trailer to a new state and make a fresh start."

'Sorry I didn't do better in computer science. My teacher wanted to send you my report card over the Internet, but I told her you think computers are a fad.'

'He must be so excited - Today is his very first day at school!'

Learner Drivers

'Wait for me right here.'