Novel Navel Gazer T-Shirts

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

God Sneezes Out Creation

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

The Teen Years of A Red Delicious.

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

You've read the book's dust jacket. Now, play the video game!

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

Horror Stories.

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

Emergency exit into Space

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."

"Static cling."

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"Well, the alternative would be to use your social media accounts to promote toothlessness."

'I'll take it!'

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

The Milky Way (Detail)

"Did you have a cat?"

'This New Year you will be bathed in a sea of cash!...Hand on...Sorry. This New Year you will need a flea bath for some sort of rash.'

Ask A Silly Question.