Nosy Nelly T-Shirts

'Hearing only half of other people's cell phone conversations is annoying. This app lets you listen in on their calls.'

Four Types of Test-Takers...

Worry tank

No Immediate Danger

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

Loch Ness Beer Monster

"He never passes by without a mischievous smile."

Nervous Student

"Ted doesn't test well."

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

"Can I put in a claim for interview trauma compensation?"

"I don't interview well."

"And, of course, if I were to get the job and start feeling comfortable here I'd no longer need the security blanket."

"It's a simple procedure. You'll be fine – as long as no one gets sloppy."

The successful rubbernecker...

"Anxiety? No, nothing that I've noticed out of the ordinary."

"In a nutshell Mr. Beesley, you have hypochondria."

Floating Dragon

"Your eels are enormous - where do you get them?"

The Return of Guarded Optimism

'Are you sure this photo is of us? It looks like a couple of floating logs to me.'

"Don't mind me. I'm just nosy."

"Is this your first job interview, sir?"

"I say this as a friend, Tom...we always know when you're bluffing!"

"You ought to do what I do—have a few belts before you meet with the old man."

Interview anxiety

"Ignore the 45,000 people. They're watching you, but they're not staring at you."

"Patient. . . seems. . . reluctant. . . to get his. . . prostate. . . checked. . ."

'How can I stop biting my nails?' - 'Always wear shoes.'

'No wonder I never have time to do anything else. I'm a one woman news team.'

"Being unable to clearly articulate responses to questions, is a common interview mistake. . ."

A pet cage wrapped in chains make the other customers in the waiting room nervous,

Teacher to student with spots: 'Tests make you nervous and break out in what?'

Try to ask for a raise.