Nostalgic Novelties Pillows

"It's your Grandpa's version of keeping up with technology...reading the papers online."

"You just put it in the slot - you don't to push the 'send' key!"

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

Trilby - 'The old studio'.

Paul goes home for the holidays

'It's worse than we thought: You've got termites.'

"We've intended to ask you about it for some time, Doctor, but never got around to it."

'Lost Diary'

'It's a book, Sweetie - it doesn't have any ram!'

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

Old cold warriors home: 'By god, I'll tell you who was soft on communism. . .'

'I must admit, this family reunion hasn't really lived up to my expectations.'

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

Old Man Journal

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

'Humph! When I was your age, I had to do my homework in front of a black and white.'

'I'm so glad this bedtime story comes in audio.'

'To me a re-run is only something I've already seen this morning.'

Bertie Wooster type teaching a parrot to talk

Bib's E-Book Readers.

"Police dramas just aren't what they used to be."

'Come on...no one would be dumb enough to buy those in a million years!'

"It was a long afternoon with granddad. I got five 'I remember whens' and three 'When I was your age...'."

"My jacket blurbs used to have such conviction, he thought to himself wistfully."

Homer

Mom's high school diary really cracked everyone up at Show and Tell.

"Click on 'new book smell'."

'I used to have women lined up. Married, unmarried - it didn't matter. Ah, forget it. Another round. Skim.'

"Now when I was a lad..."

"DOES YOUR DAD ALWAYS GO ON ABOUT SOME STUFF THAT DOESN'T GROW ON TREES."