Nostalgia Guru Pillows

"He turned on, dropped out and never came back, it's 50 years since woodstock and he still thinks that's a mirror."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Louis Armstrong

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

The Missing Sock Returns

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

'How do you like my two-tone car?'

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"10th Anniversary Woodstock Reunion'

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

Cut out and keep your own Frank Sinatra.

'It's one of these new phones that takes photographs.'