Norms Navigator Gifts

Unacceptable Social Behaviour

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

Bad for you but to die for

'Are we there yet?'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

"I am not asking for directions."

"Here at Global Com we're looking for people can 'think outside of the box'..."

'I'm a virtuoso on the middle pedal.'

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

New music conference

'What do you mean I don't take time to smell the flowers?'

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

Titanic: How's my steering.

Battery Lighthouse

'I didn't write the book report. I downloaded and printed it directly from the Internet, but I did collate and staple it myself.'

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

I often thought that I should have been a weaver of words,someone who danced and sang his way into peoples souls and through my imagination led others into a world of dreams and intoxicating revelry...But auditing offered a much better pension.

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

Set sail

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

"You are here"

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"