Non-verbal Communication Analyst T-Shirts

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie... it's my casual confrontational look."

'The usual ‘nod, nod, wink, wink' will do, Walter. We don't need the eyebrow twitch and nostril flares.'

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

"I'm fascinated by body language."

"You're overthinking it. Sometimes a belly rub is just a belly rub."

The bluebird of passive-aggressiveness

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

"I meant the dog!"

Debbie greatly misinterpreted the marriage counselor's suggestion that she and Tom have a monthly 'date night.'

Boss and worker communicating in exclaimation marks.

Body Language - "Guess why I'm annoyed."

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

'When you approach a customer, don't have your hands in your pockets.'

"Our latest survey shows our customers basically want just three things: prompt service, and apology when mistakes occur and to be treated politely..."

'Other than the countless probing how would you rate your stay with us?'

'With my new phone I can lie out of both side of my mouth 24/7.'

It's good news when an agent says "This is a big break" to an aspiring actor. But not good when said by an orthopedic surgeon holding your x-ray! It's jarring when your business partner says "We're going under while he's looking at the books. But it's very routine when said by a submarine captain speaking to the crew. "You're on fire" is nice to hear when you're playing an excellent round of golf. But not what you want to hear when you're grilling burgers. "A thumb on the scale" often mean

Messrs Wink, Nod and Nudge write book on unspoken communication.

The psychiatrist.

Mime on invisible phone in restaurant.

'Can you spare a moment for the Universe, sir?'

"I know you're angry when you cross your arms."

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

'You know, sometimes I think we don't even speak the same body language.'

'Do you get the feeling there isn't much substance in most conversations?'

"His tail has stopped wagging."

"You know what I bet it is? I bet we're breaking up but we just don't realize it yet."

"May I air-quote you?"

Body Language - Hiss!

Public Meetings: 'If you check the guide it's clear that you only need to say 'chair'.'

"We don't call these savage screaming fits. We call them confrontational verbal interfacing."

"McNab here is with our consensus engineering department."

"If I could take back ninety per cent of the things I say, then I think people would know the real me."

Motion denied. Your lips say "motion denied," but your eyes say "approach the bench."