Non Sequitur Fan T-Shirts

The Museum of Swine Art.

Scientific Research: '...The motto of science is to expect the unexpected...now be quiet. I'm trying to work.'

'Yeah...but maybe there's such a thing as looking too natural.'

'How do you like the new solar-enhancing windows dear?'

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

''Raining cats and dogs' is just a phrase, Alix.'

"Wow, what a DILF."

"You don't think this could be construed as ironic do you?"

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack Writes A Top Ten Hit

"It's a blood curdling novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a book about the brutal murder of a publisher..."

'Think about it: If we blow up the bridge, they'll have to swim across again...'

God's Double Whammy.

Mr. Macho at the game... and after the game is over.

"OMG! A portal to another panel."

Ransom Library. Oh, that's just Henry … He's a history buff. Wild West.

Gloria's life had been uneventful - until her 40th birthday, when her arms changed into swans.

"Just how powerful of a fan did you put in your computer?"

A heat wave threatens an old woman.

"Travel changed me."

"Welcome to the Desert Writing Workshop. Today we will focus on irony."

Tic tac toe.

Specialising in Multiple Personality Disorder

'Are you sure every artist paints himself?'

'Why, yes. . . Bert did work as a mortgage broker before opening this place. . . How'd you guess?'

Heat Wave Podium

'My policy is to stay in close contact with my employees . . . figuratively speaking.'

The filming of CEOs Gone Wild

'Delivery for Muhammad.'

I never understood why they talk about something "going south" as if it is a bad thing.

"Apropos-of-nothing last words." "...John Stamos' middle name is Phillip."

Please don't tell the cows they are in a cartoon.

Ostriches

When Barry decided to start a campaign for gum control.

"I like subtitles. I can watch the movie, skip the book, and not feel guilty."

'Whew!'