Nocturnal Detective T-Shirts

'My brain's secret life is keeping me up nights.'

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

A boy acting suspiciously

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

Pull and all nighter...

'Of course I'm paranoid and delusional, dummy! -- I was abducted by aliens, for crying out loud!'

Things that go beep in the night.

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

Weird – I think everything they watch is called, That actor looks so familiar what else have we seen him in.

Bat

Cats out late.

"We're going to need the best forensic accountants money can buy."

'You are not haunted by the voices of the dead - You are tuned to four extra.'

For goodness sake, can't you see I'm on a night shift!

'Ok, so you smelled gas and then you ... wait a minute! You're a family of opossums?'

Violence on TV.

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

"Finally, I would just like to reassure the American public that ther is NO 'great U.F.O. cover-up...'."

'So now you sniff out drugs. That's it, no more TV cop shows.'

"What's wrong with this telescope? I can't see a blasted thing."

Yesterday you lost your sheep and suddenly, today, Mary next door has a little lamb... Pretty big coincidence is all I'm sayin'.

"He wants to know why you flushed him down the toilet."

"Hey - didn't I see you on TV last night?"

A European Nightjar in the form of a Jar

Keeper in the bat house asleep upside down.

Two psychics have shops next to each other; one advertises "Second Opinions".

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

'Did you see who pushed you?'

"They were known as the tribe that didn't sleep."

"I'm looking for a book on ESP..." "I know..."

"I wore a wire last night to prove you really snore!"