Noble Nibbler Mugs

'Dashed if I know who they are, either, m'lord!'

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

"The most obvious side-effect of having a chip implanted in my brain is a constant craving for onion dip."

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"Sorry, sweetie, but I have the conference room booked for the next hour."

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

'Crumbs! I'm holding out for the whole loaf.'

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

cayetana de alba

'He calls himself a philanthropist, but would prefer Lord Philanthropist.'

My boat

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

The Perils of Reading Ghost Stories Before Bed.

"I envy you. I'd love to have a house with a fireplace."

Foodie Bank

'I don't care if it has lettuce, tomato, special sauce on a sesame bun...it's still liver!'

'Touch my toes? -- I have servants for that sort of thing!'

"When I was a child I spoke as a child... but when I became a man I put away childish things... except for my Cocoa Puffs... I still love Cocoa Puffs."

A House of Lords Reform: 'Please do not take shotguns or dead game into the chamber.'

"To bat that stupid rolled-up sock around all morning or not to bat the stupid sock around, that is the question."

Ditching Masks as Lockdown Eases

'Well, it might be hard to believe now, but in my youth, I was the fastest animal on land...'

Man eating 'after work mints'

'Second childhood menu, please!'

'Jenkins, you could be a great salesman if only you'd stop barking at customers and nibbling the furniture.'

"He says he's three months late because of Readers' Block!"

'She went down 80 years ago, and there's still a line to get to the wine bar.'

"It's okay, It's a shhhushhh...kebab"

Book Burp

If you give a mouse a French cookie

"I miss indoor dining"

Pale Watery

'I miss our old fashioned candlelight dinners.'