No-nonsense Enthusiast T-Shirts

A No-Nonsense Guy with His No-Nonsense Wife and Their No-Nonsense Dog

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

"Just what is a runcible spoon?"

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

"She gets her musical ability from me."

"I think it is most admirable," said Alice, "that you gave up a thriving law practice to be with this lovely child."

That Pesky 'Why' Chromosome.

"I'm very proud. Someone I've been stalking has been nominated for an Academy Award."

Bertrand Russell

Through the Looking Glass-King's Messenger in Prison

'Hey man that's a gas!'

"Mmm... our situation reminds me of an Edward Lear poem..."

'Listen my man, I am not being condescending, I am just trying to use words I think you may be able to understand. . .'

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

'The review said drinking this wine is like drinking a Rembrandt. All I taste is the frame.'

"I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill."

'Sorry, Bill's out of his office today, he should be back Monday.'

Therapists to watch out for: 'How long have you had this unnatural fear of wolves?'

'Now we'll try some word association.', 'Fling dorp snoogle!'

Little Things

"They're all down there sentenced to an an eternity of fornication, licentiousness and intoxication."

Through the Looking Glass - Alice and Humpty Dumpty.

'I couldn't get the cap off the prescription bottle. What did you die of?'

'Hello and welcome to the stupidly hyperbolic awards.'

"And together they soldiered onward, to distant horizons more splendid than either of them had ever dared to dream."

'Of course I forgot your birthday and our wedding anniversary! Hey, this is hell!'

"Look, a plastic punk!!"

'We were thinking of building something a little subtle this time... haha, just kidding, make it horrible.'

Ah! Bejezus...for the love of Mike...This wine is corked

'Black dots indicate actual creative involvement.'

"Well yes, we've been married for eighty years, but your grandma didn't want to rush things: We were engaged for thirty years before that..."