Nine Lives Explorer Pillows

"Your next life will be so much better."

For Sale - Mature Moggy. Guaranteed 2.5 lives remaining.

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

Book of Life, Answers in Back.

'I wish I were your age again, and knew what I know now.'

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

'Oh no...I'm living the dream.'

"Mi chiamano Mimi, il perche non so. Sola, mi fo il pranzo da me stessa."

Highway of Life. Bump. Bump. Bump. Bump. Bump.

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

"I'm afraid this whole experiment is about to go south."

'How a cat lands on all fours'

A seal is riding atop a great white shark!

Jasper's Limo Service.

'I'm interested in being born again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.'

'No tipping please.'

"That was a fascinating regression. Apparently, you were a pirate in a previous life!"

"It's a wheeble or some such thing, but still no sign of a deoderant."

Today is the first day of the rest of your nine lives.

"Holly and Michael were growing envious of their son's imaginary friend… Rickey and me are going to the Knicks game with Bruce Springsteen!"

"To tell you the truth, I never thought downward mobility would be so, well, downward."

Sorry, I don't play footsie on the first date. Neither do I. I guess that leaves rats.

'It all started in my previous life, doctor.'

Seven males, ranging in age from a baby to an old man, wait in a line monitored by a uniformed guard.

How?

"What's that clicking sound?"

'Are you having a mid-life crisis?', 'Let's hope so.'

"When you talked me into eternal life, you left out the part about menopause."

The meaning of life...

Maze life.

'My whole life to date catalogued - so when I pop my clogs, those who follow will know what they are chucking away <tsk>.'